I hope you’re sitting down, I’ve got some terrible news.
The new Subbuteo men are now made out of shiny cardboard with pictures of real footballers printed on them. Also, they come in packs that you’re supposed to swap with your mates in the school playground. You can’t even buy full teams anymore!
Everyone knows Subbuteo men should look like this:
This Optimus Prime doesn’t even Transform into anything. It’s just a robot with wheels on its legs!
No wonder kids today are so jaded and cynical.